moral post..

A woman (L) I knew several years ago was briefly in my life this weekend. She is a friend of an old schoolfriend.. When I am with her it's like oil on water.. I can't tolerate her.

There are reasons that extend ten years back..
Something kind of kicked over in my brain when I hit around 30ish that I really didn't think I could respect her anymore.

(I am opening myself up to judgement when I say this next thing, I imagine.. Everyone has strong views on this topic.. and you are about to hear mine..)

In a short amount of years, maybe six.. L had five terminations. She was in and out of relationships during that time - as I was as well.. so, she had become pregnant to three different men.

I heard about the first termination and I felt a bit of sadness for her, the second and I felt sorry that she would have to go through the procedure again, the third and I was disappointed, the fourth and I was angry.. and then the fifth.. I lost all respect and tolerance for her.

I couldn't believe that somebody could go through that procedure five times. I got to a point where my belly would ache when I found out she had just had another one.. It hurt me as I got older and I became more aware of how little time I had to have a child.


I feel much the same way about women and men who have relationships with married partners.
I lose respect. One relationship and I hope everything works out for everyone involved.. if they do it twice.. I wonder how it could have happened again.. Three..?

Women who write books on how to have an affair.. No respect.. none.
The thing that gets me about affairing is deceit.. Outwardly lying. I can't understand how someone could perpetuate quite substantial lies.. Is it more about the thrill of deceit than the relationship?

I know.. no relationship is ever black and white.. No reason for terminating a pregnancy is an easy one to come to..

I can write this post of course.. because I have done nothing wrong.. ever..
I'll stop throwing stones now..